In counseling, the primary relationship of healing is between the therapist and the client. In spiritual direction, the focus is on the relationship between the directee and God.

Counseling is usually prompted by some sort of issue or problem in the client’s life. The counseling relationship is meant to promote growth or resolution to the presenting issue or problem. Someone may be prompted to seek out spiritual direction because of a certain hardship in their life, but the goal of spiritual direction is to meet God and to increase attachment and attunement to God in the midst of those problems and hardships.

In counseling, the therapist keeps notes to develop a therapeutic plan for growth. In spiritual direction, the director does not take notes, rather the director’s focus is on the directee and God for the purpose of helping the directee attend to God’s activity in their life through the guidance of the Spirit.

In mentorship, the goal is for the mentee to observe and grow from someone else who is further along. This relationship can contain teaching, life shared, advice-giving, counseling, accountability, etc. In spiritual direction, the goal is for the director to host a space for the directee to be attentive to God. While some insights or suggestions may be shared, the primary focus and work of the director is to ask questions that create space for the directee to discern God’s movement in their lives and to grow in attachment to God.

Spiritual direction is not the director telling the directee what to do or what they think God is saying they should do. Rather, it is a time of the director helping the directee attend to their relationship with God based on who he reveals himself to be through his Word. The director creates space for the directee to slow down, notice, listen, and pray. The director becomes curious alongside the directee, listening to the directee and leading them both to listen to God together.